I'd like a Johnlock fic from Sherlock's perspective in the style of William S. Burroughs à la Naked Lunch. It should include descriptions of buying and using cocaine and perhaps of people in Sherlock's homeless network. The main meat of the story should come back to a Johnlock fic, but I'm not sure how romantic a story in this style would feel. It would be raw, interesting, and challenging. If you wanted to include him ranting about case work, I think it could go very well in that style.

I would write it myself if I had the ability.

They have it at public libraries, and if you google Naked Lunch Full Text, it seems like some results come up (if you need a reference).