tw: suicide attempt possible spoilers for things about Sherlock's family history, if they go through with what was discussed on the DVD commentary :)
Sherlock wasn't actually cold and unfeeling throughout his youth -- he was, on the contrary, hypersensitive to the general ills of the world. He was seriously disturbed every time he ate because it reminded him how many people were starving to death, he was aware of the distress of every person around him, he was, at a young age, struggling to figure out why one ought struggle onward through life, etc.
Then he deduced that his father was having an affair. Having that knowledge, knowing sharing it would hurt someone and that keeping it would hurt someone, wrecked him, and by the time he told his mother he was seriously distressed; in the family chaos that ensued he couldn't cope anymore and attempted to kill himself. Afterwards no one really knew what to do -- Mummy had the divorce, and Mycroft was depressed in his own way, and in Sherlock's opinion, the doctors were idiots who thought he "blamed himself" where really it was the senselessness of it that disturbed him -- so Sherlock figured the best solution was to 'shut off' his empathy as best he could and focus on the physical world -- puzzles, music, science, inhuman things he couldn't feel for and that wouldn't hurt him.
It worked.
Idk, I just want to see something that works with that -- maybe Sherlock realizing that he's started feeling empathy for John and getting freaked out, something from little!Sherlock's POV, maybe Mycroft tells John all about it and John doesn't know what to do...Gen or maybe J/S :)
tw: suicide attempt; possible spoilers for sherlock's family (as discussed on the commentary)
possible spoilers for things about Sherlock's family history, if they go through with what was discussed on the DVD commentary :)
Sherlock wasn't actually cold and unfeeling throughout his youth -- he was, on the contrary, hypersensitive to the general ills of the world. He was seriously disturbed every time he ate because it reminded him how many people were starving to death, he was aware of the distress of every person around him, he was, at a young age, struggling to figure out why one ought struggle onward through life, etc.
Then he deduced that his father was having an affair. Having that knowledge, knowing sharing it would hurt someone and that keeping it would hurt someone, wrecked him, and by the time he told his mother he was seriously distressed; in the family chaos that ensued he couldn't cope anymore and attempted to kill himself. Afterwards no one really knew what to do -- Mummy had the divorce, and Mycroft was depressed in his own way, and in Sherlock's opinion, the doctors were idiots who thought he "blamed himself" where really it was the senselessness of it that disturbed him -- so Sherlock figured the best solution was to 'shut off' his empathy as best he could and focus on the physical world -- puzzles, music, science, inhuman things he couldn't feel for and that wouldn't hurt him.
It worked.
Idk, I just want to see something that works with that -- maybe Sherlock realizing that he's started feeling empathy for John and getting freaked out, something from little!Sherlock's POV, maybe Mycroft tells John all about it and John doesn't know what to do...Gen or maybe J/S :)